Have you ever prayed for something and just the opposite occurs? I think we all have at some point.
For the past few years, I've been crying out to God, take me deeper, restore the joy of my salvation, give me the childlike faith I used to have. I want such a hunger and thirst for Him that I am never satisfied.
When I first got saved, I prayed for world overcoming faith. I really think that was the Holy Spirit prompting me to pray that, because now that I've been walking with the Lord for 20+ years, I don't think I'd word it quite that way. LOL!
I'm not writing this to gain sympathy.... I'm writing because one I feel like the Lord asked me to and two because I think my life parallels what the Church may be going through (just different circumstances). Often, I "feel" an atmosphere and can pick up on what others are going through, or a spirit a city may be oppressed by.
I have been being hit with wave after wave of depression, a longing to go home/heaven. I am discouraged. I'm tired of not feeling well, living with chronic pain & suffering day in and day out. I'm tired of not sleeping much. I find myself thinking why would I want to continue living if this is what life is going to be. I feel like what Solomon wrote in
Ecclesiastes 1:2 “Meaningless! Meaningless!” says the Teacher “Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.”
I believe the Church is being pressed beyond measure. I believe we are experiencing trial after trial and crushing after crushing for a reason. We are experiencing hardships and suffering because God wants us to go deeper. I don't believe He's the author of these, but I do believe He uses them for our good and for the good of helping others.
Sunday, our pastor said the theme of this year is "Going Deeper". I resonated with that, because I've been praying that for sometime.... I do believe God is calling His Church to a deeper more intimate relationship with Him. We are coming upon a great storm, something that we need to know Him, trust Him and can depend on Him to see us through. The only way we can do those things if we go deeper. We have to be willing to go into the deep end without knowing the outcome. We have to jump in even if we don't know how to swim.
Last May, the Lord told me he was taking away my Facebook income. One by one all my accounts dropped off. In July, we were told to move out of our rental which was affordable. The only rental God opened the door for was one that was almost double what we paid. We jumped in - trusting Him..... We are now paying 3x what we were (mostly because our electric/gas bill). Our income is not enough to pay this increase and we have had to pay most by credit card. This is the first time since 1986 that we have had any credit card debt or debt at all (except our house in KC). This is quite difficult because we are barely keeping our head above water. Why am I telling you this? Well, once again the Lord is showing us WE MUST TRUST HIM - and that He is our provider. We must learn how to depend on Him for everything. I have had a few animated discussions with Him because I had enjoyed going back to work (remotely) and making an income again. It was such a nice 2 years of not having to wonder how we would pay a bill or how we would be able to eat? God has always been faithful but if you've had to depend on him for everything, you know it's still a hard walk to walk. Just a few days ago, the Lord said to me, this is an answer to your prayer. You asked to go deeper. You asked for faith that would sustain you? You asked for world overcoming faith. I am so ready to throw in the towel.... and yet somehow, His grace sustains me and I overcome.
It is so easy here in America to make our income our god; to make health insurance our god; to make anything that brings us comfort our god. I believe the Lord is wanting His Church to release everything that will hinder us in going deeper with Him.
Are we willing to surrender our daily life to the Lord? Are we willing to be intentional day in and day out to seek the Lord for what HE has planned for our lives that day? And will we be obedient?Recently in our home group, we were talking about the passage in John 14:14 If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it. What it all boiled down to was as we abide with Him, as we seek His Kingdom first, then we will bear fruit. Fruit not only the fruits of the spirit, though those are important, but fruit meaning we will know His will, hear His voice and act on what He asks of us. I saw this graphic on Facebook and it resonated so deeply within that I wanted to share it here. "Time is non-refundable. Use it with intention!" There is so much that God wants to do in us and through us, but we have to be willing. I'm sure some of us are doing some things that are good, but let's all ask God if that's what He wants us to be doing.
Here are a few questions I pray and ask when I wake up each morning.
1. Lord, what is on your heart today?
2. Lord, who do you want me praying for today?
3. Lord, is there anyone that you want me to do something special for? Is there someone in need?
4. Lord, what do you want me to learn today in Your Word? How can I apply that to my walk with You?
I pause between these questions and listen intently...journal what I hear and then act on it! I don't mean this arrogantly but He wants people to be encouraged? I must text sometimes upwards 10-40 people a day - something I sensed in my spirit. I often get a response that what I sent was very timely and quite encouraging. Sometimes we just have to be intentional on LISTENING! Not always asking - oh and believe me, I ask and ask and ask.
Going deeper may unfortunately take a trial or an unwanted experience to get your eyes on Jesus. Sometimes, a thorn in the flesh helps us to become more dependent on Him. Sometimes going deeper may mean just rest - not sleep necessarily, but rest in Him. Cease striving and KNOW that He is God.
Lord reveal to us Your heart - what do You have for us to do? What is something we can do that will bring glory to YOU? We want more of you Lord!! Take us deeper!!!
On another note I wanted to share a pretty cool story. I met this lady (we'll call her Deann just for giggles). I met Deann about a year ago. We've become fast friends and I have been lifting her in prayer because she lost her husband unexpectedly about a month after we met. In mid-December we were out for coffee. I had a sense that she was going to tell me she met a man. She did. She told me this really amazing story on how she met this guy, a relationship was not on her radar and yet he fell into her lap. It was love at first sight - literally. I asked her if she met him 30 days ago. She said oh my gosh yes exactly! Immediately the Lord took me into what I call a "movie reel vision" - I was seeing the next 30-45 days play out in my head. I began to smirk and she said "What? No, don't tell me" She knows I hear from God. So I said ok, fine, I'll text myself so that I can share it with you another time. I texted that there was a whirlwind of activity around these two and that she would have a ring on her finger before Valentine's Day. I really sensed that she would be married by then, not just the ring. Well, two weeks ago, we met for coffee again. She was telling me how they were getting super close and I asked her if they had discussed "it" yet. She knew what I was asking and said Yes. That they hadn't used the "word" yet but they were talked about in a round about way. The Lord told me to tell her we were ordained just in case. Last week, she texted me to say "they" were on the way over to our house. She was picking up some soup I made and he was giving me some homemade elderberry syrup. But, I knew they were going to tell me they were engaged. When they walked in - she said "We need your services". Lol. She asked us to officiate their wedding which is coming up the end of this month! How fun is that!! What I so enjoy about this story, is that God knew what the two of them needed even before they did. They have so many things in common and have such a great friendship already! I also love that God does things SUDDENLY! So if you are praying for something or not - God still knows your need and He will do it! That's encouraging!
Prayer & Praise Updates..
1. Please pray for additional income. Ken has missed almost 2 weeks of work as there is NO work. His boss is really good to him and gave him whatever he could, but inside jobs this time of year are needed and unfortunately there isn't much work. Other employees often don't work for months at a time. Yikes! I have just a little income coming in from Thrive....but not enough. Pray for opportunity for that to grow!
2. Please pray as it is finally on my calendar with the help of a good friend to write my books. The Lord has been asking this of me and I just haven't had much mental stamina or motivation due to health. I have a friend who is going to help me write and organize my thoughts and stories. I'm excited. Pray we get this launched in February and it goes well!
3. Please pray for health - sleep & pain mostly. I still deal with 24/7 chronic pain in back, knee, hip & feet. I've also have many other symptoms I won't bore you with. I am getting some sleep but it's not deep restful or long sleep. It leaves me with little energy and limited focus. Have you ever looked up sleep deprivation? Don't! Chronic Pain wears me out!! I'm hanging on by a thread..... trusting God that one day soon, I will see my healing!
4. Our home group is growing and I am finding myself already praying for God to expand our space once again. I prayed that prayer for a year in our last home before he moved us here. We love love love the house we live in. It truly is an answer to that prayer. We are comfortable in it - just need the resources to make sure we can keep affording it. There is nothing here any cheaper, however. We do love our home group. We are truly building some deep relationships and growing in the Lord together.
5. We love our new church - we are attending the local Assemblies of God. Our pastors are real, authentic & passionately in love with Jesus!
Please let me know how I can pray for you. I am thankful for those who reach out with prayer requests.
Hugs, love and prayers.
Ken & Michele Cole
michelecole.thrivelife.com - quality freeze dried food - simple to use, quality, non GMO, nutritious & delicious.
Here are ways you can give if you feel led:
1. Non tax deductible donations can be made to:
Ken & Michele Cole, 103 Geneva Ave, Hamilton, MT 59840 (preferable as the options below will tax us)
This is the only way currently we can use funds for our personal needs at this time. or through
Paypal - paypal.me/micheleacole
Cashapp - cash.app/$micheleacole2019
2. Tax deductible options:
Checks payable to Sonlit Fields, 103 Geneva Ave, Hamilton, MT 59840
This goes into our ministry account to be used for outreach and saving towards our vision.
Donor Fund - The Signatry - Ken & Michele Cole - listed under Want InSight Fund.
7171 W 95th Street, Suite 501, Overland Park, KS 66212
Phone 913 310 0279
This is an option to keep gifts anonymous - again for outreach and savings toward our vision.
God has given us a vision to build a retreat property along with ministry equipping center.
The retreat portion of our ministry is to provide a safe place for pastors, lay leaders & other ministry folks to come and be refreshed & encouraged through prophetic ministry (if wanted). We will offer private cabins with kitchens & full bathrooms, and plenty of places to roam on the property to get quiet with the Lord.
We will offer other specialty retreats - marriage, healing, prophetic teaching & activating people into the world & health and wellness retreats and more.
The Lord has graced us with the desire to come alongside the Church - to bring healing, deliverance & freedom to new/newer believers. We are not wanting to replace their church, but better help them be ready to serve in their church.
In our community building - we will eventually have a 24/7 prayer room, healing & prophetic rooms and a place for community worship services for those on the property.
Our passion is to minister to a lost & hurting world. To equip the saints to do the same and to be a blessing to our community and surrounding areas. Our hopes are that we can pour out God's love in a mighty way to bring more and more souls into the Kingdom, get them discipled, called into their purpose & destiny and released to do God's business!!!! We also have a passion to give generously to help those in need and to help others launch into their God given destinies.